i used to be straight edge.
people always ask if i'm going to be straight edge forever. i guess i can't answer that. and i think thats okay. but i do know that i dont care about drinking a glass of wine at my wedding. so stop asking. IUTBSE is here for you to tell your story to anyone who wants to hear it.
if you want your story to be heard, send it , along with a picture of yourself, to iusedtobestraightedge@gmail.com
despite what it may seem, this site is not only for people who USED to be straight edge. its for anyone who has ever had something positive to say about the lifestyle.
-IUTBSE
Jul 1st, 2009 @ 8:36 pm
My name is Gerry Krakowski. I come from a small town called Pleasantville, in Westchester County NY, just outside of New York City. I’m Vegan Straight Edge.
The social scene in my high school was sharply divided into cliques. All of the jocks and the preppy kids drank alcohol, smoked cigarettes, and randomly hooked up with each other. They were also the ones starting trouble with me and my friends for as long as I can remember.
I’ve always felt like I had a lot better things to do than get drunk. Instead of getting wasted at house parties, my friends and I went to punk and hardcore shows in New York City. We started local bands, learned the words to all of the local songs, and booked shows at any school, church, coffee house, stranger’s house, bowling alley or youth center that would let us. Most of us didn’t drink.
Whenever there was an altercation between my group of friends and some of the other kids, we were the ones to get blamed. It felt like the whole town was against us. The Jocks would have a party full of underage drinkers and get away with it because the cops were too busy taking our skateboards away and getting town laws passed to keep us out of public places.
For me Straight Edge started as a reaction to this whole situation. I wasn’t interested in drinking or drugs in the first place because I was already having fun without those things. I liked the idea of living my life without a crutch or a filter. I liked the idea of forcing myself to experience things fully, and ultimately be a stronger person because of it.
I decided to label myself Straight Edge mostly because I wanted to demonstrate that I was committed to living my life sober, but also because I was frustrated with the social situation in my town and I was looking for a way to alienate everyone who wasn’t like me.
I was 15 years old the first time I came to school X’ed up. It was my own personal “fuck you” to the other kids at school and the establishment that had taken their side. Back then I would refuse to associate with anyone who wasn’t Straight Edge (or who didn’t follow the basic tenants of Straight Edge). I would destroy people’s cigarette’s, smack beers out of peoples’ hands, tell people I was better than them because I was drug free, and basically any other arrogant Straight Edge thing short of physical violence.
Today I’m nearly 23 years old, I’m Vegan (I went Vegetarian at 16 and Vegan at 18) I’ve never smoked a cigarette, never been drunk, and I’ve tried marijuana once (though this was before I became Straight Edge, and contributed a lot to my decision to claim).
These days Straight Edge isn’t so much about outward hostility for me; it’s just the way I live my life. I hear that’s how it is for most Straight Edge people as they get older; the choice becomes less external and more internal (though I still X up at every show I go to and wish more people would).
Most of my early Straight Edge friends have fallen away from the movement; I’m one of the only people left from my original crew of 10 -15 kids. It was only when most of my friends had fallen away from Straight Edge that I started to actively seek out the larger Straight Edge community.
I’ve never been in a band (though I still want to be), never started a zine or anything. I guess my function in the scene is to bring people together. I’m the guy who bugs the shit out of you to go to the show because some no name local Edge band is playing. I’m the guy who searches Facebook, Myspace, and any other conceivable place online that you might find a Straight Edge person, just to introduce myself, see if maybe you want to hang out and then proceed to introduce you to every other Straight Edge person I know.
I’m at a place in my life now, where I recognize that this path only gets harder as you get older, but I also recognize that I wouldn’t want to live any other way. Friends fall away and new kids claim and break left and right, Straight Edge itself goes through trends, but ultimately it’s been good to me and I’ll never turn my back on it. I’m True ‘til Death.
